Infinite Struggle

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Hard times I am facing,
no place to lay my head.
In the streets I seek refuge,
white scolded covered lips.
No saliva in mouth,
it has taken a family trip.
Water is such a scarce commodity,
one taste would be a refreshing experience for my thirst.
like something never experienced before.
haven’t eaten in days so my body begins to devour itself,
so much that my appearance is like the skeletal remains of a carcass in a grave.
Tattered and torn clothe,
adorn my dirt filled figure.
The drenched scent of my body odour as it excrete my pours,
could make a skunk rolled over, flat lined in an instant.
Yes I am poor, but why am I poor?
This question reverberates through my skull,
as if construction work as just begun in my head,
I think I will call this one the reconstruction of my brain.
Still block by block,
my peers and I live a life of savagery trying to survive.
Its kill or be killed in this concrete jungle,
where the big lions roam with high powered weapons and side arms that are chrome.
No one to save the damsels in distress,
everyone is stuck in their own mess,
of debts, loans and clouds of financial stress,
forecasted by weather.
Like the towering hand of a giant strangling me to death,
and no matter how I try to find a way out.
it’s impossible for tears are drowned by my fears,
and in this infinite struggle there’s no escape.

Prisoner Of Poverty

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Just knowing that I am poor,
is a fate crueler than death.
It’s even harder to think straight when i am prisoner of poverty,
while in the cold confines of my cell.
I am lost in thoughts,
imagine there’s mouths to be fed.
No possible job in site,
clothes and food to buy,
but I am broke as hell.
Bills, debts stacking up high,
and I am barely getting by.
Prisoner of poverty that I am,
trapped being these walls,
peeking from steel bars.
thoughts of escaping, constantly plagues my mind.
tirelessly trying to make a plan,
every corner I turn I am surrounded by poverty and his gang.
Poverty your prison can’t keep me down for long,
my plan is to execute the greatest escape.
It might not be today,
but I am definitely working at it for tomorrow.
your feeble minds can’t understand,
for Poverty’s prison I need to get away from.

An Idea (Making Love)

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I am in love with an idea,
it is a crazy idea but I don’t wanna stop.
The idea is me holding your hands,
fixing your hair the way you like it.
It is me kissing your face,
playing with your toes.
It is me fixing you a treat,
or running you a bath.
Getting you dressed,
or putting you to bed.
It is you laughing at my jokes, making funny faces just to evoke a smile.
The idea is me caressing your skin,
invading your space.
Taking control of your mind with my whispers,
It is me creating rhythm with your body symmetrically and systematically
It is me making you fall like rain,
and your body crashing like thunder.
The idea is me making you erupt like a volcano.
I like this idea, as crazy as it seems,
I hope for our sake it will not only be a dream.
But a reality for us to share, and cherish.
This idea begins in the mind, and I hope it ends in the heart.
The idea is us making love.

Connected Spirits

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I can’t help the way you make me come alive,
I feel the need to tell you how good talking to you make me feel.
I know it’s crazy to think that we can become so attached by merely exchanging words,
But once spirits are connected it’s hard to dispel.
I know what I am feeling is natural,
and we are not breaking any rules by exploring each other’s minds.
Sometimes it is good to get away from the norm;
the same approach to life bears fruit to monotony.
Let us just allow the waves to crash to the shores;
things won’t go farther than it is supposed to.
If the way I am feeling now is a crime,
then I’m a criminal.
Who is willing to do time,
with the punishment designated only by you.
We are living in a world built on crazy ideas,
that has proven to be magnificent.
Why not build you and i a crazy idea?

I Miss You

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In your absence,
the mirage you left does not keep me warm.
Now that your gone,
my mind and heart can’t tell who’s more torn.
Your silhouette is clear,
yet your face is distorted.
I miss who you were,
before you contorted.
Since you’ve been gone,
There’s a void where you belong.
We use to laugh and cry,
now only sheer silence remain.
You taught me to listen to the world as it speaks,
It spoke not by words but by emotions.
You taught me to listen to my soul,
well since you left, i put it up for sale,
For i didn’t know what else to do with it,.
My poems aren’t the same no more,
for the language is gone.
You started this,
I am here reminiscing on your kiss, in a state of total bliss.
Your the missing piece to my puzzle,
don’t you see without you there’s no match.
I am held captive by my thoughts,
no more you to make things clear.
You’re the fire in my lighter,
I am in need of a smoke.
Why in the world did you leave? Do you think i am a joke?
You were the start to a new love,
an inextinguishable flame,
But how can we grow if you’ve disappeared.
I tried everything in my power just to keep you close and near,
I guess I was too weak oh dear.
Like a drink that’s not fizzing,
I’ve gone flat.
My sister, my lover, my friend, won’t you please come back?
Without you I’m a hermit,
I’ve retreated,
Laid down my banner,
Set down my spear,
Unable to fight back against the cruelties of my fears.
The cruelest thing possible is to live in a world where the bees don’t buzz,
and the flowers are all shriveled up,
for the sun doesn’t shine.
You’re my backbone,
My glue,
My tie.
Please come back,
so we can laugh
and cry.
I miss you like the sun misses the day,
I miss you like the plants miss the rain.
I am like pollens blowing in the wind,
with no you to carry me.
You need to come back home,
for this is where you belong.
I can’t do it on my own,
I need your helping hand.
So I am here waiting for you,
I hope you understand.
I miss you my wife,
don’t you miss your husband.

What’s Love? (Love Is)

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Tina Turner said it best,
“love is nothing but a second hand emotion”,
for me love is without devotion.
I love to love,
but love doesn’t love me.
love has always been home,
for that’s where it’s safe.
Love is pure.
Love is how the sun and the moon switch shifts,
taking turns to smile at us,
while the stars keep check of the time.
Love is there and nowhere,
love is felt and forgotten,
like a distant memory.
You see love is everywhere but not here.
Love is like grapefruit and honey,
A combination that is bitter sweet.
It’s elusive like a butterfly,
that’s rewarding when caught.
Love is like a bee, that goes from flower to flower,
leaving pollens along its path.
Love is something we all need,
it’s like the oxygen we breathe.
We strive to acquire it,
for its every man’s desire.
Love is tricky to understand,
Yet we all want to be loved.
Its like our helping hand,
Trying to place us miles above.
It feels so good we forget to breathe,
And that’s when most of us fall for defeat.
Love is like a coat,
that keeps us warm through a storm.
But when your too busy loving others,
You forget to love yourself.
How selfless is that?
You love to love your lover,
Yet love loves itself.
I will never forgive love,
for not letting me love her back.

© Xavier Frazer 2016

TORN APART

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The thought of seeing you with him,
hurts more than the break up did.
Picturing you with him hand in hand like we use to be,
brings tears to my eye.
We were like siamese twins who depended on one heart for sustenance,
the same as plant’s need the sun.
Before he came our bond was inseparable,
a bond now shattered into fragments,
scattered around the globe.
My heart now without beat like roses without thorns.
Our conversations at night was the best,
now there’s nothing left.
Everything changed since he came along,
I never trusted his smiles,
you did, why?
He comforted you with his lies,
now far from the truth you reside.
I saw his true nature,
from you they were hidden,
I can’t believe you were blind.
Was it that you saw something in him,
that no longer existed in me?
He came and messed up the melody,
of our ongoing love song now the rhymes don’t rhyme,
and the beats are without rhythm.
Leaving a song no one wants to listen,
like the screeching sound of a despaired heart.
You’ve forgotten all that we created,
left me without a second thought.
Gotten swept away by him,
like leaves in the wind.
Now I am devastated, loneliness replaced my heart and we are torn apart.

© Xavier Frazer 2016

STILL WAITING

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No matter how I try to evasively maneuver this feeling,
I am caught between pause and waiting.
I stand beneath the night sky,
gazing up at the distant universe beyond the stars.
The stars they shine like spotlights beaming down on a crowd flocking Yankee stadium,
Or perhaps the eyes of God watching man.
This night is as cold as winter,
And even though I wear a jacket to soothe this polar wind,
It still manages to seep through my skin.
One hand in pocket,
While the other holds a bunch of roses,
As they wither towards a inevitable death.
Still waiting…….
Every time we talk,
You said you love me,
I have yet to feel that spark.
So many questions asked,
No answers given,
I now measure the space you barely occupy.
While I am trapped in the vast and endless dark,
Still, I stand waiting like a flightless bird that dreams of flying.
Forever seems like never,
Today is already here,
Tomorrow is far away,
Still, I contemplate holding you near.
You said you love me,
I failed miserably at believing,
For you have said this phrase so many times.
Yet, your actions speak otherwise,
No calls
No text.
Really what’s next?
Still waiting for you to love me,
While I wait my heart keeps falling apart.

© Xavier Frazer 2016

Rape, Death, Saved by Angel’s

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They were going so fast,
Without knowing it,
And the arguing continues unknowingly.
She begged him to stop,
He wouldn’t listen.
The music he placed on full blast,
Just to ignore her.
Her screams are like the wind as it travel across the waves,
And his yells are suffocated causing his own demise,
Slowly….
They both fire verbal missiles,
like pedal pushers,
pedaling for the push.
His friends laughed,
Faces bear wide grins from ear to ear.
What’s sad is that the victim cries,
And there’s no one to hear.
The car accelerates,
As the tempers flare.
The air dark and moist,
Brings light to a very unpleasant atmosphere.
No traffic light to stop,
They jolted down the dusty track.
Too fast to handle,
breaks couldn’t be found.
They tried to drift,
Wheels skid throwing the vehicle off the cliff.
It hits the ground in a thundery crash,
And no one could’ve survive that.
Surprisingly she was kept,
And in the bosoms of Angel’s she slept.

© Xavier Frazer 2016

GUILTY CONSCIENCE

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Questions you asked,
Answers I failed to provide,
I opt to get out the room for the tension is high.
Tired of the arguing,
Yet, your heart yearns for the truth.
Tried for the exit,
but it wasn’t in reach,
The words you spoke stung like a bee,
That froze me immediately.
Deep sighs taken one after another,
My heart sank low,
Sometimes I just can’t bother.
Couldn’t wrap my mind around the words,
They dealt heavy blows,
Like the fists of a boxer going in for the win.
I see your cold blank stares,
And I can tell from your eyes,
That your tired of being comforted by my lies.
The nightmares are constant,
My second nature has gotten the best of me,
And my conscience it feeds at what’s left.
The day I fear the most is here,
It doesn’t seem to be going anywhere soon,
It has travelled a far with packed bags bearing gifts of truth.
The curtains about to go up,
Putting an end to this my charade,
So there’s really no point to continue.
I should just be a man about it and make things clear,
Silence strangled my voice as I tried to speak.
Questions reeled off your tongue,
like bullets from the planes in the battle for Pearl Harbor.
When the smoke subsided,
I was still struggling to speak,
The truth was in my grasp but far from reach.
They say the truth sets you free,
But not in this case,
it’s hard for me.
I did what I knew how to do best,
And that was telling constant lies.
The exit now within reach,
I look back to see you starring.
The truth I figured you knew,
but you still wanted to try,
Just to see if I would come around this one time.
I left with guilt eating at my conscience and a heavy heart,
I love you but I had to keep you in the dark,
For I know the truth would’ve torn your heart apart.