Chaos Of The Mind

The hardest part about living is going through life not knowing who or what I am meant to be,
I keep trying to live up to people’s expectations of me,
For some I am a friend, a motivator, an inspiration or perhaps a
beacon of hope.
So many effort put into crafting and discovering myself just to end up lost,
In a time paradox of a multi complex universe
where dreams materialise and small corporations turn in to franchise,
Misled by a delusional illusion of my mind
Like the fact that the blood beneath my skin is blue and once it hits the open air it becomes red.
As if that wasn’t already a burden,
I am left to travel along this weary path with confused souls who are like ticking time bombs with very short fuses,
This is not your ordinary muse,
I am just an average guy who refuses to be conformed, contorted by this reality with no surety of what lies in the next.
It’s just a hit, smash or pass situation causing unwanted frustration,
Disguised in an awkward mobo jumbo of black and white complications
Where my sanity is a mess and is in need of constant sanitisation.
They say a beautiful mind is attractive,
How can I see the beauty of mine, when it’s in complete chaos?