DIED LIVING

Some days it feels like the walls are closing in

No one hears or listens to the pain I am in,

I wonder if I am cursed or perhaps I have committed an unholy sin.

Always tethered to take the loss,

Not even one chance at winning.

It’s hard to keep my thoughts in check

When all I do is overthink,

My mind always has it foot on the accelerator.

People who I thought would’ve held me down,

Tend to be the ones who has an hold of the knife in my back.

I can’t even breathe a breath of fresh air

the atmosphere of toxicity,

Is all that I live in.

Striving to live, yet still I am struggling,

Needing help but no fucks giving.

In this hell hole I keep sinking,

Quicker than quicksand.

I am dying to live.

Still, I have died living!

©️Xavier J. Frazer

State of Insomnia

I’m an insomniac
Tormented by this reality,

where innocent smiles are nothing but façades of murderous grins.

Old enough to not be scared

Yet still I am afraid of bed time stories,

For they turn out to be nightmares.

And the lullaby’s you hear sounds like an episode of beetle juice lost in auto tunes,

A remake of Beethoven’s Scary masquerade.

Tired of these Insomnia’s

I really need to get some rest.

But,how can I sleep knowing that I will be waking up to the horrific news

Of lifeless bodies laying in the streets,

Be it close or in some remote location

I have yet to discover.

I never believed in fairy tales
Given the trajectory of the times I wish I had,

This may seem girly but I wish

I was Alice in wonderland or perhaps Dorothy in the wizard of Oz.

A click of my heels would take me to an utopian home

As chaotic as things are I have to deal with this mentally derange zone,

A zone where everyone is suffering from some kind of sleepless hypnosis.

As madness and lawlessness roam free

Sporting faces of glee.

© Xavier J. Frazer 2016

Enough Is Enough!

It becomes an unbearable task
Watching the news,
Instead of being informed,
You end up being depressed.
Disasters all around,
Nothing seems to be changing, from sunrise to sundown.
When will enough really be enough?
Cliché as it seems;
It’s a thought that rests on our minds,
Often times too scared to make it to our mouths,
Suffocating before it makes it way out our lips,
Asphyxiation is imminent.
The need to speak out plays heavily on our hearts,
Built up courage killed by the  fear of death,
Like an undeveloped foetus destined for abortion.
Still enough is enough;
You take your last breath in observance,
Of the strong preying on the weak.
Damsels at every turn awaiting knights in shining armour,
Who are too afraid to make an entry.
Left alone to face these criminals,
Gloomy faces,
Teary eyes.
Trapped in an agonising reality
Deafening cries
falling on deaf ears
Enough is Enough!

Untitled

I walk around everyday people see me smiling, they don’t know that i am actually afraid.

A lot of people hand out death, but are afraid to accept it.
Some people hear the sounds of the guns, others are the recipient of the bullet.

What’s the point in sticking around if your here today, only to be gone tomorrow.
I see whats happening around me and try to be different, but at the same time I am losing all my friends.

I have lost so many friends to the point that, losing becomes the norm for me.
Its like they have powers to only disappear without the ability of reappearing.

I am in fear that my life maybe snuffed away, making me another victim on the pavement twisted.

    ~Xavier Frazer©